No Longer Under Law, but Grace

For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.

For the past few months till now, the book of Romans is being covered during Service. I have indeed learnt a lot from it. I had never spend time discovering about the book of Romans before. Therefore, I really want to thank the Lord for the truths that I have learnt.

I was brought to realization that I am already died to the law as Christ came to meet the demands of the law - which we can never meet. Therefore, I have died with Christ and resurrected with Him. I am now living under the Grace of God.

The word "Grace" may appear to be a simple word but it actually carries a deep meaning. The Bible tells us that we are saved by grace through faith. Furthermore, it is by God's grace that we are forgiven of the sins that we commit everyday.

However, many Christians have taken this grace for granted. We have nullified the power of grace over us, forgetting that this grace actually cost the life of Jesus. The Apostle Paul stressed this again and again that we should take God's grace seriously and not to take it for granted.

I thank God for showing me this and to give me the law which points out my sinfulness. Just like what the speaker said, "As someone matures as a Christian, he will be more sensitive to sins." However, we are victorious over sins as the battle has been won on our behalf. Christ died for all.

Hypocrite I will be, Sinner I will be, but God please help me.

I want to be a Christian.

And I Thank You Lord

But it goes against the way I am, to put my human nature down...

Trials are not set by God to bring us down, but to train us and mould us to be a better person before God. It is always against the way we are as we have to put our human nature down. At least for me, I feel very painful and sometimes felt like crying out loud. My heart always break as I deny myself everyday. I wished that God did not create us to have feelings and emotions. Life would not be as painful if emotions and feelings are not present.

However, we do not have a choice. God created man to have a relationship with us and thus, we need to have emotions and feelings to relate with God. Perhaps it is just a matter of the way we express them. Emotions and feelings are perhaps given for us to glorify God by expressing our love for Him and desire for intimacy with the Lord. However, with our sinful nature, we tend to abuse them. We based our emotions and feelings on the wrong objects - another person or persons.

As God's children, we are given the Bible and Holy Spirit to discern right from wrong. Thank God for allowing us to examine our lives again and again ensure consistency with His Word.

"Oh no! I have set my emotions and feelings on the wrong person." Perhaps we have asked ourselves this question. At least I came to realise it. After some time of evaluation, I think that the time is not right yet as I would be stumbling the other person or affect the person's service unto God. The right pursuit would result in God having two more person who truly possess the love for Him. If I were to continue my pursuit, I guess it would end up as a mockery unto the Lord.

I read a book which quoted, "Instead of being selfless, it is selfish. Instead of being patient, it is impatient. Instead of focusing on the on-going good of the other, it is focused on the needs of the moment."

I find this statement really true. I had to question myself about the pursuit that I had. I came to a conclusion that I need to think through how to focus on others other than myself.

I guess a practical step I could take is to really cease my thoughts and actions. Frankly speaking, it was really a tough decision to be made as there are so much times when the heart is willing but the flesh weak. I did not know whether I could sustain through - at least till the point when my focus is totally set on God alone. However, instead of taking a long time to consider and weigh the "toughness", I decided to take that step.

Decisions are just decisions, if not followed by actions, it is equivalent to nothing. For the first two days, it was really tough for me. Each time I had the thought to pick up my phone, or when I was holding on to my phone, I would have the temptation to send a message. Each time I log on to the Internet, I would face the temptation to say a "Hi". Temptations are indeed real and loud. However, as God's children, we have the power to overcome and say "No" to them.

I came out with a good method. Firstly, I would sink myself in God's word. This means that whenever I face the temptation, I would go back to God's word and spend time with Him. Secondly, every morning I would tell God that "Lord Jesus, today I'll live for You". This would keep me conscious and it is an expression that I am weak and I need Him to guide me to live the day for Him.

May I learn to be satisfied in Him so that He can be glorified in me.

I feel that the following song is very appropriate for me at the moment.

And I Thank You Lord
For the trials that come my way
In that way I can grow each day
As I let you Lead

And I Thank You Lord
For the patience those trials bring
In the process of growing
I can learn to care

But it goes against the way I am
To put my human nature down
And let the Spirit take control of all I do
Cos when those trials come
My human nature shouts the thing to do
And God's soft prompting can be easily ignored

But I Thank You Lord
With each trial I feel inside
That You're there to help, lead and guide
me away from wrong

'Cos You promise Lord
That with every testing
That Your way of escaping
is easier to bear

Yes I Thank You Lord
For the victory that growing bring
In surrender of everything
Life is so worthwhile

And I thank you Lord
That when everything is put in place
Out in front I can see Your face
And it's there You belong

When All is Possible

"The Calvary strength that led Him to say 'Not my will but Yours be done.';

The Calvary cross that makes Him carry His cross willingly."

"What on earth gave Jesus the desire to finish His mission on earth?" sometimes we might ask this question. Indeed His love can never be fathomed by anyone. However, the things that led Him on was nothing too far from the Calvary strength and Calvary love.

Jesus asked for the cup to be taken from Him yet He wanted the will of the Father be completed in Him. In His ministry on earth, He never lose His focus. Though He got tempted by the devil, His response and resistence pleased the Father.

I realised that I have been allowing my focus to be distracted by things of this world. Although I am convinced that I am nothing but a pilgrim on earth, waiting for a better country, I was never serious to live the life of a stranger on earth.

Through my life, God has put me under many tests and trials. However, my response to everyday test is the same - "I give up!". The tests and trials were put in my life so that I may be refined, moulded and transformed into a man that pleases God. However, I was always ignorant and missed out the opportunities to be trained. He has given me many chances in my life but I missed them all.

After I made the decision to return, I have also made the decision to take all things seriously and to really seek God with a sincere heart. He has shown me verses after verses and the one which was so real to me was Philippians 2:22 when Paul mentioned that Timothy has proved himself in the work of the Gospel. I want to be a Timothy.

As a disciple and follower of Christ, life is never smooth and easy as it consists of continuous refining. My life has never been easy compared to the life I once lived. Problems come after problems and I was being forced to stop handling things using my own ability but to trust Him. In my weakness, He becomes stronger. Of course, God has been faithful and true.

After teaching me and putting me through practicals on Faith, I think that God is currently teaching me how to handle my feelings and emotions. While learning, I have to really practise obedience as I have to bear through the unwillingness to give up my control and to resist the temptations. This journey is still a long way to go as I foresee that there are so much things to be learnt.

Despite all those things, I will hold on to the fact that God is Sovereign and He will purposefully allow things to happen. For the issues I am currently facing, I will just wait and trust. I believe that God has a plan and He has already prepared His best for me. All I have and need to do is to live out Isaiah 40, to put my hope in Him and wait on Him.

There will definintely be times when I feel weak. However, I know that I will be granted the strength and love which led Christ to sacrifice His life so willingly. I also believe that there will be a day when I will mount up my wings and soar like the eagles.

Keep me in prayer.

There is a Place

There is a place
high in my mind
Where lofty thoughts,
ideals fly high
But in that place,
Lord You must reign
And I must cease
to think I'm wise

There is a place,
locked in my will
Where I would move
as I would choose
But in that place,
Lord You must reign
And I must lose
my will for Thine

There is a place hid in my heart
Where secret dreams
and hope I guard
But in that place,
Lord You must reign
And I must lay them down to die

There was a place,
cold burial ground
Where all my sins and
grief were bound
But from that place,
Lord You were raised
Now I in You through
death shall reign

There'll be a place,
O glorious day
Where pain and death
be done away
And in that place,
Lord You will reign
And we shall sing
Thee ceaseless praise

Pass Me By

We met as siblings-in-Christ
You taught me to love Him
You led by example

We spent joyous time together
We shared our burdens together
We laughed, we grew, we cried

Out of foolishness
I left the place
Out of foolishness
You left, too

Like the lost son
I returned home
But I have lost you
You are still not back

I happen to see someone whom I have yet seen for about two years. I met him in church and he taught me how to love God. We learnt and grew in Christ together. But soon I left. A year later, I returned. However, I have never seen him again. He left and is still not back.